Lori Meyer

Post Holiday Phew!

2011-12-29T11:28:00.000-08:00

PPPHHHEWWW! That was fun! December 29th is here and the holidays are winding down. We had a great family time together. New family rules this year: no presents for adults; we eat and drink when we want to and not when someone says it is ready; no dressing up; and everyone must shower once a day.

Hannah and Haleigh got bikes from Santa, and IPod Touch from Babaw, who isn't particularly interested in what Santa does. This morning I am cleaning up the mess and reflecting on what a joy our "new normal" family is. We miss Bill, no doubt about it. That may never go away, but things are certainly fine now and much easier, by far. My favorite line from Wendy when she was doing her first real Christmas the traditional ways was this: "Christmas: Not so much fun for the mother!" I have to admit that was true for me for many years. However, this year was fun finally for me. The kids are grown and don't mind if I just stay home and sleep in my own bed.

Our best Christmas ever, we went as a family to Maui for the week before Christmas. When we returned we put up a fake tree, laughed and sang with Sally. I can't remember a single present that year. I'm so glad we did that because all we really keep are those memories of times together. Our kids were teenagers then. Today they are grown women making their own way in the world...and THANK GOD...Their own Christmas!

I'm off to Vegas to Bruno Mars on New Year's Eve at Bellagio's Bank Night Club. I live a pretty darn good life. I thank God for bringing us all through to this day. Phewwwww!

Fallin'

2011-10-10T20:17:00.000-07:00

Fall is here! I know because I have my first nasty cold. I'm allergic to fall.Maybe because fall means work and papers to grade...or maybe something blooms and my immune system overreacts; it is, after all, MY immune system. (as I sneeze for the 145th time today)

One thing I know for sure is that I need to find myself some adventure and fun? Things have been too dull around here. Has anyone seen a short bald man who likes to frequent strip clubs and laughs way too loudly?

Summer Song

2011-06-01T19:56:00.000-07:00

June 1st....I can feel summer coming. A couple of weeks ago friends and I attended the Doheney Blues Festival and had our music feast that starts summer every year. Last night, my girls and I checked out a new happenin' restaurant on the 101 in Encinitas. The students have shut down at the Bobcat Bungalow. I find myself dreaming of days with my books and dog in the sun under a palm tree, or going round and round the lake on the bike. Plans are made for opening day at the races. A Gregurek wedding will rock the world in July. And...as always....I am ready to make some new mistakes!

Come on summer....Let's party!

Change

2010-11-13T20:38:00.001-08:00

Change has come, as it always does, with me holding on tight to yesterday, refusing to let go. The facts of life are that people die, friends leave, children grow up, lovers betray and life goes on, and on, and on. We keep waking up, whether we want to or not, to the consequences of our choices and the choices of others.

My friend says take "the path of least resistance," but I always resist. Sometimes I think I'm only here to learn how to "let go" of what I love. I'm sure getting lots of practice at it anyway.

I surrender!

2010-06-27T22:02:00.000-07:00

I surrender to technological advances: I love my new Kindle! It lets you look up a word you do not know at the click of a button. It lets you archive books on line, so no more shelves (or piles) of books all over my house. It is a wonderful little thing.

I'm just going to read all summer. Read, nap, eat, walk Lucy...that is it. (and maybe travel a little)

I love being me!

2010-02-17T21:35:00.001-08:00

I love being me right now. I have good friends, a warm home, and a car that runs. My work is my passion. Nobody depends on me for much of anything, except maybe Lucy. I travel when and where I want. I live in Del Mar, CA, near two of the most beautiful beaches in the entire world.
I have a new pair of Uggs on my feet. I can read a compass. Lucy loves me...and I am following my dreams where ever they take me. I have an unwavering belief in the positive. Both my daughters have graduated from college and make their own money. Life is soooo very good!

Monday, Monday

2010-02-01T21:06:00.000-08:00

It is amazing how much work a teacher can do with the students are not there. I went to work today, even though it was an optional day. I got so much done. It was a full day with lots of happiness....saw the girls for a few minutes tonight, too.

Good Question

2010-01-28T06:54:00.001-08:00

How will you show God's love to the world today?

Things I'm Pretty Sure Of

2010-01-21T20:28:00.000-08:00

After fifty years on the panet earth,
these are a few things I'm pretty sure of
and other chiches:

1. What goes around, comes around.
2. My parents loved me the best that they could and much more than I deserved.
4. You cannot build happiness on the pain of people you love.
5. An unwavering faith in the positive improves most days.
6. You choose your attitude.
7. If you can earn a living for doing something you love, you are very, very lucky.
8. The universe is unfolding exactly as it was meant to.
9. You don't know what you've got till it's gone.
10. I am responsible for my own inner peace.
11. Perspective is everything.
12. Nobody really cares what you are wearing.
13. If it tastes good, it has too many calories.
14. I can, in fact, live without a Classic Coke and chocolate. I just don't want to.
15. It is not about me.
16. Respect is earned, not demanded.
17. You cannot make someone love you. There is nothing you can DO to make that happen.
18. What goes up must come down.
19. Change is inevitable.
20. You don't really have to understand everything. Accept that you may never understand.
21. When you ask the universe WHY? ....get ready for the answer because it is coming in ways you can never imagine.
22. You can lose way more than you think you can.
23. No one can take away your education, experience, or memories.
24. The human spirit is unimaginably resilient.
25. God sends people into our lives to help us through hard times.

Lonely?

2009-12-13T20:40:00.000-08:00

This season is sometimes hard on my single friends. We feel more alone this time of the year. Even though we all have good people in our lives, the desire to be some one's true love has been sold to us -- along with other fairy tales. Those of us who still hold out "hope" sometimes return to the on-line dating cesspool. Others of us just enjoy the moment we are in and walk our dogs in the rain. Our friends prop us up and phone to check on us as the cards and letters flow in from all the happy families out there.

This year I am not alone. I have a solid relationship with my savior, who walks with me and talks with me every day. I have a sweet little dog who loves me most and sleeps at my feet. I have two daughters who call when they need money or have drama. I have a father and brother and two grandchildren, whose laughter makes me want to breathe another day. I have wonderful friends and 156 students. I am not alone.

But many people really are alone this time of year.

I spent three hours today with an eight-year-old boy at Chucke Cheese. He lives in a group foster home facility behind locked doors. I asked him what he was doing before I picked him up.

He said, "I was sitting in the TV room watching Sponge Bob."
The stark reality of his situation decends on me in that moment. He is a child.

Today is his birthday. There was no visit from his mother or father. There was no sibling to torment on his own special day. There were no presents to unwrap. So, I picked him up and took him to Chucke Cheese, where for forty bucks, you can buy a birthday party for two. We had tokens, pizza, Coke, and a cake with eight candles delivered by a guy in a mouse costume.

He actually knew people there. A man whose adopted son rode C.'s bus came up and greeted us. The man's children handed the boy tokens and tickets, and they ate some cake with us. Every where we go C. knows someone. He's eight today. He lives in the present moment enjoying life as it comes. He shovels pizza and cake in like it is his last meal. He beams as he waves to me from the play scape inside the arcade, which somewhat resembles a Vegas Casino for kids. He chastises me for opening my book to steal a moment between the pages when all that Skeeball fun is waiting for me.

When we return to his group home, his favorite childcare provider is waiting there for him, a sweet older black woman all ready to love him up. Her voice is velvet as she croons her welcome to him. He shows her his loot. In the end, he is not really alone either. I leave him in her capable hands, and the door locks behind them.

This season, we are not alone. We are here to love each other. Let's not forget to love each other. The best gifts we can give are compassion, forgiveness, time and attention. You can't buy those at Nordstrom's, Wallmart, or even Amazon. They are certainly not on Match.com or at the gym. We can find them in our hearts, and hopefully, we can give them away.

We are not alone. What better time to remember this than Christmas?

A Year in the Life of a Single Woman

2009-11-05T21:18:00.000-08:00

I've been thinking tonight about what a great year 2009 it has been.
I must have read 100 books!
I got over a broken heart;
Traveled a bunch...
And bought an old Chevy truck.

I went sailing, dancing, and swimming.
I flew over the Misty Fiords.
I went off roading in the Southern California desert.
I've been to Napa, Mendocino, Eureka, Coos Bay,
Portland, Bass Pro Shop, Seattle
Jeauno, Sitka, the Mendenhal Glacier, Channel Islands,
Big Bear, Yosemite, and Mammoth Mountain.

By the end of the year, I'll add Vegas, Galveston,
Austin, Key West, and the Bahamas to that list.
I took the summer off.
I gave up Cokes.
I rode my bike around the entire bay, up to San Clemente and back, and around Miramar Lake.
I bought some Tupperware and saw three comedy shows, Wicked twice, and after this weekend LOVE, the Beatles show in Vegas.

My life ROCKS!

Hello Mr. Winter

2009-10-28T18:03:00.000-07:00

Sunny cool breezes turned to cold today in San Diego.
My students came in out of the cold at break glad, for once, to be inside where it was warm.
This is the day we realize that it is finally time to put away the shorts and flip flops in America's Finest City.
My family would say....time for some Mexican food!
So, I'm on my way to Hernandez Hideaway for a cheese enchilada to celebrate winter.
(Any excuse will do!)

This time of year always gets me down.
It is endings to me. People leave.
The leaves fall from the trees.
The dreaded holidays loom on the horizon.
I feel most alone in November and December.

It is a time for reflection.
It hasn't been a bad year.
I studied and learned many new things.
I traveled and saw places I never imagined I would.
It was a low key year...no real highs or lows...
I guess all I can do is keep putting one foot in front of the other
Even if the walk leads me to winter weather.
I'll drag out the Ugg boots, put on a sweat shirt
And enjoy my enchilada!

Whittier Poem

2009-10-15T06:48:00.000-07:00

A poem by John Greenleaf Whittier

No longer forward nor behind
I look in hope or fear;
But, grateful, take the good I find,
The best of now and here.

I have been rejected by.....

2009-10-10T10:05:00.001-07:00

I have been rejected by........

a man who spray painted his goatee red, white and blue.
a man who smoked pot with his child.
a man who had an unhealthy fascination with Spiderman.
a man who wanted me to shave his back in the summer.
a man who owned Pit Bulls.
a man who had half a foot.
a man who asked me to finance a lawn mower for him.
a man whose house had not been cleaned since 1973.
a man who abandoned his family.
a man who local psychologists have on a "warning" list for single women.
a man who fathered three children with three different women.

It is a wonder I can get out of bed in the morning.

No Life

2009-10-08T20:43:00.000-07:00

I seriously have no life. Work is sucking the life force from me at an alarming rate.

So many books, so little time!

2009-10-03T04:55:00.000-07:00

Books! I love them. Not the Kindle, or the downloads....the real paper and ink...turn the page....beginning to end....book. In my life, it seems like this has been The Year of the Book. It started in January when yet another TOOL decided I was not young enough for him. I read every self-help book under the sun about MEN who cannot commit/love, while he was off cavorting with his thirty-year-old ski bunny. In hindsight, the thousands of dollars I spend on books and therapy could have been better spent on a trip to Hawaii...but you know what they say about hindsight. And I think I can re-sell the books on Amazon.com now.

Anyway, from there a friend at work recommended Extreme Sex and Other Desperate Measures in March....and I was "gone" for five days inside that incredible memoir. This year I have read books on everything from e-mail to earwigs. The summer's best book was no mercy (intentionally not capitalized) by Toni Morrison. It is a historical fiction book about events surrounding a "family" in colonial America. I read so many books this summer that Jeff had to put up a new bookshelf to hold them all, but no mercy was the best. David Wolfe's Eating for Beauty (as IF I could be more beautiful!) really made an impact also. It got me to give up my morning Coke, and that is a miracle in and of itself.

This fall I'm reading The Presence Process because Sandy insisted. She asks for so little from her friends, so clicked "process order" on Amazon one more time and dove right in. I really am growing from it, but it is pretty heavy stuff. My church small group is reading Max Lucado's Fearless. Though work has me dragging myself to bed instead of Nancy and Doug's at 7:00 p.m. on Thursday nights, I am reading the book anyway. It is about the awesome love of God and how as Christians we can be fearless in His love. A Course in Miracles has also caused me to pause some this fall.

I have been trying to save money by buying books used and at library sales, but Amazon has my number. You would think that my love of books and people would make me a candidate for a book club group, but I'm too independent for that. I don't like hosting and attending regular meetings about anything. However, like I used to "need" to run...I now "need" to read. I read at stoplights...when I wake up at 3:00 a.m. and even on the lonely Saturday nights. My love of books has seen me through a pretty cool year in my life...the one between 49 and 50. What the hell: I can't ski.....!

2009-09-25T07:02:00.000-07:00

S-E-P-T-E-M-B-E-R

School
Entertainment
People
Time
Essays
Messages
Back to School Night
Earning
Rest

Question of the day: Why is there no F for Football in September?

Transitions

2009-08-31T21:37:00.000-07:00

Life is full of transitions. Many of my high school friends are experiencing the transition of the empty nest with kids going off to college. Though that empty room is hard to face, it just means a new phase is coming. One of my young friends is moving from elementary school to middle school tomorrow. Oh, the joys ahead for that one! Another friend is transitioning from a 30 year marriage to life as a 50+ single woman after the death of her husband. Lots of alcohol are required for this one. I feel one friend transitioning out of my life. And a new school year starts for me tomorrow, as I transition from the easy-going summer days to the hamster wheel of work.

I'm not ready, but I know it is necessary. I always go kicking and screaming into the next phase of life. Why do I resist it? It is inevitable. I hang on to the past like a miser hangs on to his money. I just don't want to let go.

One thing I've learned though is that we don't get to choose. The transitions come whether we like them or not. Usually, they bring a future that someday I won't want to let go. So tomorrow, I'll kick off my flip flops and scrounge around in the closet for my favorite black pumps. I'll do the best I can with the transitions and try to hold on to hope.

Ray Romano's Raspberry Cream Cheese Brownies

2009-08-27T22:22:00.001-07:00

From goodhousekeeping.com/celebritydish

Brownie Batter

1 c. butter (2 sticks)
1 c. cocoa powder
1 c. sugar
1 jar (10 oz.) all-fruit seedless
raspberry preserves (3/4 c.)
4 lg. eggs
1 tsp. vanilla extract or 1/2 tsp. almond extract
1+1/4 c. all-purpose flour
1/4 tsp. baking soda
(sift all dry ingredients)

Swirl Topping

1 pkg. (8 oz.) cream cheese
1/2 c. sugar
1 lg. egg
1/2 tsp vanilla extract or 1/4 tsp. almond extract
1 c. raspberries
1/4 c. sliced almonds, optional

1. Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Lightly spray 13" x 9" glass backing dish with nonstick cooking spray.
2. Prepare Brownie Batter: In 2 to 3 quart heavy saucepan, melt butter on low heat. Whisk in cocoa (sifted)and cook until mixture bubbles (do not over cook). Remove from heat and whisk in sugar and preserves. Whisk in eggs and vanilla until thoroughly blended.
3. In small bowl, sift flower and baking soda; add to chocolate mixture, stirring just until blended. Pour batter into baking dish and smooth top.
4. Prepare Swirl Topping: With mixer on medium speed, beat cream cheese, sugar, egg, and vanilla until blended. Gently fold in rinsed and drained raspberries with a large spoon.
5. Spoon large dollops of topping over brownie batter, spacing evenly. With a knife, swirl topping into batter. Sprinkle with almonds, if using.
6. Bake 30-35 minutes or until toothpick inserted in center comes out almost clean with a few moist crumbs attached.
7 . Cool completely in pan on wire rack. Cut into 24 squares.

a mercy

2009-08-16T07:05:00.000-07:00

When I read a good book, you know you are going to hear about it! I have been powering down from a busy summer and cocooning in my "tree house" reading for the past couple of days. Yesterday, I read Toni Morrison's a mercy. It is worth an afternoon in a chair.

I have to admit, Toni Morrison's writing sometimes confuses me, but I pushed past it this time. I was well rewarded. Each chapter is told from a different character's point of view. One hears the story of a "family" created in the 1680s in the Americas. Until the final chapter, one does not realized the thematic tie of human mercy: acts of great sacrifice bestowed upon another. Morrison gives a slap to God and miracles on the way out the door, too. That should have bothered me, but it didn't. The abandonment of the main character did touch me deeply and bring me to some resolution of my own abandonment issues. Perhaps there is some mercy in being abandoned when we are in life.

As summer draws to a close, find a soft spot and let Morrison remind you that we are all in this together.

Defying Gravity

2009-08-13T12:30:00.000-07:00

Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I'm through with playing by
The rules of someone else's game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes
And leap...
It's time to try defying gravity
I think I'll try defying gravity
And you can't pull me down

I'm through accepting limits
Cuz someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change
But till I try I'll never know
Too long I've been afraid of
Losing love I guess I've lost
Well if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost
I'd sooner buy defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye,
I'm defying gravity
And you can't pull me down!

So if you care to find me
Look to the Western sky!
As someone told me lately
Everyone deserves the chance to fly
And if I'm flying solo
At least I'm flying free
To those who ground me
Take a message back from me!
Tell them how I am defying gravity
I'm flying high, defying gravity
And soon I'll match them in renown
And nobody in all of Oz
No Wizard that there is or was
Is ever gonna bring me down!!

Just the HIGHlights

2009-08-11T14:32:00.000-07:00

I have been having a high time this summer. Last week on Wednesday, Lori Sue, Colin and Leah arrived from Texas. They wanted an escape from the 104 degree days, I guess. We did have some fun. We went to LA to see Pat Green; we lounged at the beach several days; we hiked; we sailed; we cooked; we read; we danced; we swam; we Facebooked; and they left too soon. My tiny condo seems very empty without them.

I'm off tonight to see Wicked again! I do love that show. I saw it twice last summer, too. This summer is drawing to a close. I've started checking work e-mail again. I have to go in two days next week and four the week after that....to transition back to the grind. I didn't do much of what I planned to do in June, but that isn't anything new.

I've made some really healthy changes this summer, and I'm proud of those. I read some good books and enjoyed lots of travel. It was time well spent. I'm ready for the fall.

Blues and Beer

2009-08-03T09:42:00.000-07:00

Mammoth Festival of Beers and Bluzapalooza was a wonderful event. Friday night Rod Piazza's band rocked the place, and someone tried to sell me drugs in the crush up by the stage. I felt 19 again! The whole thing was outdoors under huge moutain pine trees. I made lots of "new best friends" as I sometimes do at these things. I'm afraid there may be photographs out there somewhere.

Saturday morning I saw Devil's Post Pile and Rainbow Falls on a four mile hike. Saturday afternoon the crowd at the festival had tripled, but the beer was cold and the music was good.
Janiva Magness put on an even better show than she did at Doheney Bluesfest. She sang "Fool Me Again" and "You Were Never Mine" right to me. She had on the coolest shoes, too. She is my newest mentor! Saturday night after a lovely dinner, I went looking for the Mammoth Lakes...found them...in the moonlight. There were no bears.

Sunday, my dreams came true! I got to see Yosemite National Park, not all of it...just the highlights on the way home to San Diego. It was everything I imagined it would be: just stunningly beautiful. I didn't miss a waterfall! I am going back with my bike soon.

I decided on my way home yesterday to make a list of all the places I have visited this summer and the fun things I've done. When I was looking at the map yesterday, it seems pretty outrageous.

June/July 2009:
Napa, CA
Mendicino, CA
Avenue of the Giants
Eureka, CA
Elk Meadow (going back with the bike!)
The Oregon Coast
Portland, OR
Cabellas in Washington
Seattle, OR
Jeauno, AK
Ketchican, AK
The Hubbard Glacer
Glacer Bay National Park
The Misty Fiords
Sitka, AK
Victoria, Canada
Ashland, OR
Redding, CA on July 4th (spectacular fireworks!)
Sailing off San Diego coastline
Fishing the Eastern Sierras
Inyo National Park
Mammoth Beer and Bluesfest
Yosemite National Park

I know there are things I'm leaving off.
I need to stay home now awhile and process some of this travel. The 1,001 photographs are amazing. I'm sure I'll bore my friends with them for years to come. As my dad said last week, "It's time to settle down now and get ready for school to start." Hey, maybe I am 19 again!
This time I think I'll listen to my dad.......Nah...probably not.

Nutrition

2009-07-29T10:59:00.000-07:00

With my free time this summer, I've been studying nutrition using library books. One of the interesting avenues I've come across is the "food combining" theory.

Here are some guidelines from Nomi Shannon's The Raw Gourmet:

1. Drink liquids alone. Drink at least 20 minutes prior to meals, not at the meal itself since liquids dilute the digestive juices.

2. Eat melons alone. Wait 30 minutes before consuming anything else.

3. Eat fruits alone. Lemons or lemon juice are the only exception to the rule. Both go well with all food and act as a preservative.

4. Do not combine acidic fruits with sweet fruits (e.g., oranges and dates).

5. Do not combine proteins and starches (e.g., nuts and yams).

6. Do not combine fruits and vegetables.

7. Do no combine too many different types of foods.

Note that avocado, summer squashes, zucchini, peppers, tomatoes, and cucumbers are classified as fruits. Also, watermelon should not be eaten with any other foods. It passes through your system in 20 min. If you eat other food with it, it will slow down and ferment.

Interesting stuff! It sounds like eating things ALONE is the way to go. That won't be much of a problem for me. I'm alone pretty much of the time.

Education

2009-07-27T13:48:00.000-07:00

I love to work. I took a sub job this morning that was listed as Special Ed Moderate to Severe.
I had no idea what I was getting into, but I was ready to get dressed and teach again today. I had so much fun. I worked with two seniors, a boy and a girl, who were classified as emotionally disturbed. I fit right in! I had forgotten how much fun high school kids can be.

In the hours that I was in the other teacher's classroom, I came across a quote I want to share here. I loved it.

"The most valuable of all education is the ability to make yourself do the thing you have to do, when it has to be done, whether you like it or not. " Aldous Huxley

She also had up these 10 Rules for Being Human. (no author was cited) ENJOY!

1. You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it will be yours for the entire period of this time around.

2. You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called life. Each day in this school you will have the opportunity to learn lessons. You may like the lessons or think them irrelevant and stupid. Non-the-less, you will have lessons throughout your entire life.

3. There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of trial and error, experimentation. The "failed" experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiments that ultimately work.

4. A lesson is repeated until learned. A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can then on on to the next lesson.

5. Learning lessons does not end. If you are alive, there are lessons to be learned.

6. "There" is no better than "here." When your "there" has become a "here" you will simply obtain another "there" that will, again, look better than "here."

7. Others are merely mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you something you love or hate about yourself.

8. What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. The choice is yours and yours alone.

9. Your answers lie inside of you. The answers to life's questions lie inside you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust in yourself.

10. Unfortunately, many people will not pay attention to all of this. The question is, will you learn from life?

Just walking my dog

2009-07-15T16:02:00.000-07:00

Today Lucy and I were on our routine walk up the hill of High Bluff past the elementary school when a sweaty runner shouted, "Excuse me, Miss!" I turned.

"Have you seen a tall guy run by in a Torrey Pines t-shirt?" she asked.

"No, I haven't. Not yet," I answered.

She caught up with me. I don't keep a very challenging pace...at what I call Lucy speed.
She looked familiar. Turns out she was a student of mine...I thought four or five years ago...but no...longer than that...she had just graduated UCLA.

God, I'm old!

I remember this girl because she was a brilliant writer and a delightful young woman even as an eighth grader. Sheila M(something)....she was in class with Kyle Canepa and Kate Theilicke, who also just graduated college. They were a fun group. We had some laughs...learned a few things...read some good literature. I hope I some day look back on my time with Mark Detrow and Ethan Cohen (TPHS future freshmen next year) with such warm feelings.

We shot the breeze and caught up with the particulars. She is looking for a job in sports medicine before going to medical school. Wow...some day I could be wheeled into an ER somewhere and run into this girl. "Geez, Ms. Meyer, what did you think would happen when you jumped out of an airplane at 65?" or this "Someone call in a psych consult!"

We approached Lucy's most extreme walking limit...she pooped. I bagged. We turned to go. But I ambled home with a smile on my face. Before I left the house I was a loser mother who always lets her children down when they need me most. Someone with very little money in her bank account who needs to lose 70 pounds. I walked home the teacher of a doctor. This is why Carmel Valley is my home.

Summer in SoCal! Gotta Love it!

2009-07-14T08:15:00.001-07:00

Wow, life just starts moving so fast sometimes you just have to flow with it and try to keep your head above water. Alaska and the Pacific Northwest was amazingly beautiful. It was two weeks of pure heaven. When I returned Megan was here, so focus shifted directly to her and did not move until she boarded a plane to Dallas Sunday. I haven't even uploaded my pictures yet. This week I'm enjoying some down time, walking Lucy, swimming in the ocean, reconnecting with friends. I am gradually switching to a more healthy diet and am proud to say I am nearly off Coke completely. I've been reading the work of David Wolfe, a local nutritionist, and have become a convert to the "green juice." Abdul at the juice bar prepares me 32 oz. every four days. I've replaced my morning Coke with that. The great disconnect has gone pretty well. I don't even miss the cell phone. However, I have still been using the e-mail and television. I've become a big fan of Rachel Rae and The View in the mornings. I have not been writing. I hope to start back this week. Maybe I just did....

Seattle Underground!

2009-06-25T22:09:00.000-07:00

Today, I saw the second highest waterfall in the U.S.A. It was pretty darn amazing. Then I went to Seattle, Washington for a Mariner's game. The Mariner's beat the Padres 9-4. Following that was the fantastic underground history tour and dinner in a dive bar across from the hotel. My days are full! Who ever said vacation was for relaxing?

Oregon: Who knew?

2009-06-24T22:18:00.001-07:00

Oregon is one of the most beautiful places I've ever been. Hawaii is the only thing that even compares to it. There are so many trees and so much water. Today I was on these giant sand dunes near Coos Bay...they were like massive desert dunes, but right on the water. It is all so pastoral and clean. Even Portland is clean. I want to move here. I have a feeling I will be coming back here some day to raft a river soon!

North to Alaska

2009-06-21T20:37:00.000-07:00

I leave tomorrow to drive to Seattle where I will board a boat for Alaska. I'm apprehensive about leaving Lucy, but I am feeling very brave, too. Perhaps I'm brave because I refilled my Xanax prescription this afternoon. I have the patch for sea sickness. The Atlas is beside the door. So "North to Alaska" it is.

Monday!

2009-06-15T09:23:00.001-07:00

On Monday during the school year we tell what we did on the weekend. Today is my first day of freedom...the first Monday of break. So I'm going to tell you what I did this weekend.

Friday, we teachers collapsed at Teo Leo's for our usual post-school year "conference." From there, I met Sandy and Scott at the Solana Beach train station and went to the San Diego County Fair. Jim Bishop had designed and implemented several gardens there. After touring his botanical haven, we discovered the 25 cent foot massage. Lives were changed forever. I cannot understand why every home in America does not have one of these devices. They are heaven on earth! Then I ate some junk, while they all ate veggie sandwiches; although I did pass on the chocolate covered bacon. Really? Chocolate covered bacon? Someone said, "Let's take some fat strips and dip them in chocolate!" I did not eat those, I'm proud to say. However, I can never ever miss out on the Australian fried potatoes with Ranch and processed cheese goo. This year I challenged myself to branch out and tried the deep fried smores. It was not so great. My puritan friends did each try a bite of my poison each time, too, with the exception of Father Ed the purest of all the puritans.

Saturday I experienced one of the most bizarre things I've ever encountered: Chicken Poop Bingo. At the Perris, California Rods and Rails Festival, I plunked down a $2 donation to a charity trying to raise money for vocational scholarships in the small desert town. If you have never seen Chicken Poop Bingo, you have not yet lived. A rooster is placed in a cage on top of a wooden board grid painted with fifty numbered squares. Chicken feed is thrown down. People pay $2 for a square or number. Then everyone stands around and waits......for the chicken to poop.....on your number. REALLY! Grown people with 401K accounts stand there watching the chicken peck until he poops. Well, on this day, I was with my elderly friend Helen, who is so much like my mother it isn't even funny. I knew mother would do this if she were here, so I gave the guy my $2. Helen picked number 25 and put her name on the slip. Helen was convinced I had completely lost my mind. We returned a couple of hours later after a lovely train ride and a tour of the Orange Empire Railway Museum. A crowd had gathered around the chicken coop. Things were looking good for us, as the chicken had settled into an area near our number. We were just about to walk away when the chicken's butt began to twitch. He was standing one number away from ours. Helen politely suggested that he move to our number. He turned around to look at her, and then pooped on number 25. Helen won $50! I am not making this up. It really did happen. And I have not lost my mind.

When I got home I called Lisa immediately to see if she had heard of such a thing. She said at the same time this experience was happening to me, someone on her boat dock was telling her about "Chicken Shit Bingo." Lisa and I have a special energetic connection that crosses miles and time.

Sunday, I was lazy. I took a walk on the beach and found a whole sand dollar, an omen predicting a beautiful summer ahead. I took Wendy to urgent care for her throat issues then came home and took a nap on the couch with Lucy.

Life is so good and so filled with unexpected surprises. Happy Monday!

I love ALONE!

2009-06-12T05:52:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I spent the entire day alone at Disneyland. It was the most fun I've ever had there. I had the whole day at the park to do whatever I wanted whenever I wanted. Of course, I saw students in every ride line, but I didn't have to hang with them. I ran into a couple of other chaperons once or twice, but only in passing. In the middle of the experience, I came to the conclusion that I love ALONE!

First I rode the Matterhorn. I got through the line in 20 minutes. Then I sent straight to the best roller coaster in the park Space Mountain. The wait was 40 minutes, so I had lots of time to think. I did not think to bring my MP3 player, so I just listened to what other people talked about. It made me so glad I didn't have to make small talk with anyone. After ten years of doing this trip, I spent time remembering previous days at Disney on school field trips. I have a picture that shows Bill went with me one year, though I have no recollection of the day. But there he is, with his arms in the air on Splash Mountain with Steve and Lisa, Tom and me. It must have been one of the first years we went. I remembered June 16th in 2005: the day at Disney that I couldn't get Bill on the phone all day, the day Bill met Cheryl Cotton at a baseball game, the day Tom and I felt an earthquake coming out of the Haunted Mansion, the day my life and family changed forever. Luckily, it was my turn to board Space Mountain though...enough of those memories.

As I climbed to the pinnacle of the roller coaster, I my mind flashed to the last time I was on a roller coaster in November with "the amazing people of steel." My stomach flipped in tactile memory of the eight straight rides on the roller coaster at Magic Mountain. Will I ever ride a roller coaster again without thinking of Grant, Jena, and Amber? Like those days with them, Space Mountain was so worth the wait and so worth the jolt at the end. I love Space Mountain!

I ate when I wanted, peed when I needed to, and rode only the rides I wanted to ride. I controlled my own destiny! With all that time to think, it occurred to me that this day was much like the place I have arrived at in my life right now. I do what I want when I want and am very careful about what I commit to doing with others. Only my own needs and wants have to be considered. What a great gift this season of my life is! I love ALONE!

Basketball

2009-06-04T21:02:00.000-07:00

I just LOVE watching basketball now for some strange reason!

Sausage Cream Gravy Texas Style

2009-06-04T06:39:00.000-07:00

I'm up at 5 a.m. this morning making Texas Style Sausage Cream Gravy for David Greer's retirement party breakfast. I'm thinking, LORD, it is no wonder people in the South carry extra weight...if we eat this stuff on a regular basis! As I'm stirring white flour (Godforbid) into real salted butter (Double Godforbid) and drippings/grease from fried ground sausage (Triple Godforbid), I'm channeling my Aunt Mildred....I can hear her voice in my head saying, "It needs a little salt, honey." I dash in a little ground red pepper and, of course, more salt. I can picture Philip Gregurek around a campfire saying, "You can't git this in California," as he stirs a pot of his etoufee. I give my roux an extra whisk to be sure there are not any lumps. I don't want to shame my "countrymen."

David is not exactly returning to Texas in his retirement. He is off to Mississippi where he will get, on a regular basis, the best fried Gulf shrimp and hush puppies you can imagine. But I have been assigned the task of Sausage gravy and biscuits, and I have a giant crockpot full now.
Can I get it to school without spilling it in my foreign car?

May Gray and June Gloom

2009-06-01T06:19:00.000-07:00

Good Grief! Three straight days of this gray misty gloom has me wandering around the condo with dirty hair wearing my Ugg boots, mean green sweats, and a really over sized t-shirt . This is NOT the SoCal life I signed up for! Every year it arrives like the Del Mar Fair, or the Opening Day, and every year I whine. It is such a small price to pay for July, August, and September, yet I must complain every year.

Now that I have that off my chest, I get get on with the more positive elements of my little world. Two weeks from now, I will dismiss yet another set of eighth graders for the last time. It always sets me to wondering just how many young people have passed through my classroom since 1984. I release this particular group of students with some serious regret. They have been so charming and so good all year. I will certainly miss them. My sixth period class, in particular, has been the most amazingly good group of students I've had in years. They LOVE to read. They would read even if they weren't asked to...and do. They are smart, funny, interesting, and well-behaved. They are my favorites and they know it! As they walk out my door, I wonder where life will take them.

Summer is on the way, and I anticipate it with reverence. Disneyland, the taco dance, commencement, and sunshine. Long lazy days with Hannah and Haliegh await me. Bring it on!

My Heavenly Life

2009-05-27T21:26:00.000-07:00

No vibrations in my pocket today
Just a day full of
Eye-contact, touch, and big hugs
My new numbers.

Lucy's adoring looks
The smell of Jasmine
On the vine

Time with Han
At the arcade
Around the buffet

Helping Karen go to the river
In her Magic Carpet Bus

A little country music
On the radio

Reading the climactic scenes
Of To Kill a Mockingbird
To three classes
And not putting anyone to sleep

Friendly e-mails with
My full disclosure friend
And a book to sleep with
On pink softy sheets.

My Heavenly Life!

Liberation!

2009-05-26T07:36:00.000-07:00

I'm doing it! I've been cell phone free for two days. It doesn't suck. Life is good.

Letting Go....

2009-05-23T16:18:00.001-07:00

The day before a lover leaves I rarely know he is going. I never see it coming. I whine and cry to my friends who tell me, I did, in fact, see it coming and chose to ignore it. However, I do see the end of my cellular life coming tomorrow, and I am making the most of my beloved scratched, dented Samsung today, my last day with a cell phone. I have held it, caressed it, put it between my breasts, texted people, and have checked the time on it even though I'm wearing my watch. I thought about every cellular interaction today...

What would I do if Wendy was late for our lunch date and we couldn't coordinate like we did on text messaging?
How would I ever keep up with Cherylann's love life without our Saturday morning debriefing sessions?
Can I really walk Lucy for thirty minutes without calling someone to chat?
Can I get through the day without an update from the junkyard?

Tomorrow is stage one of "operation disconnect." I spent the morning typing everyones phone numbers into my computer and making a list to put by the antiquated house phone. I sent an official, businesslike e-mail to anyone I thought might call/text me about the change in phone status. I took Wendy to the AT&T store to transfer the contract over to her name. She promptly bought an new IPhone and took on the responsibility like the grown adult woman she has become. I stood there feeling like a father about to walk his last daughter down the aisle...dancing with joy and choking back tears at the same time. All my babies have finally grown up and have their own cellular plans.

O.k. that may be a touch melodramatic, but hey, I'm not crying in my beer. I'm going to close my eyes, raise my hands, and let it go.....

Ups and Downs

2009-05-21T20:03:00.001-07:00

Life has its ups and downs. There is no question about it.

On the up, I was curled up on the couch last night with my two gorgeous grandgirls watching Idol and eating popcorn. They were here all night, and I got to see their sleepy morning faces this morning. Hannah's snuggles are best of all in the morning. Wendy is experiencing success as a budding young journalist, as we always knew she would...with her dream deferred. Megan answered my e-mail (Cat's in the Cradle). And I still have my job and the life I choose in Carmel Valley. I'm writing again.

On the downside, I opened my 401K statement from last year and found I had lost 27K of my retirement fund. My Honda needs new brakes. Two of my dearest loved ones are battling lung and bone cancer. I have no reasonable means of supporting myself in August, and my body fat ratio is over 34%. I have to stop for air half way up the Swamii's stairs from the beach. It is the best time in my lifetime to buy a home in Southern California, and I don't have a down payment.

But, I'm sleeping in a warm bed tonight with my little white dog at my feet. I had a lovely dinner at Sammy's. Last weekend was a blast seeing Brian Regan at Copley Hall and Ruthie Foster at the Doheny Blues Festival. My church home is thriving and filling my spirit with love and opportunities to serve. I've read a ton of books already this year. My girlfriends and I are going to our first Padres game for the season this Sunday and the seats are still at least in the Field level.

However, I'm totally burned out from this school year and all my extra duties. My house looks like a colorbook bomb exploded in it. My Honda smells like puke inside. And I have no immediate goals or aspirations, with the exception of restoring an old pickup truck.

My friends tell me I am "inconsistent," an adjective I own with humility. I say I'm just rolling with the flow of the river of life...up and down...up and down. Sometimes you are the bug, and sometimes you are the windshield.

Disconnecting/Hyperventilating

2009-05-13T16:53:00.001-07:00

So, I phoned Timewarner Cable today to see about disconnecting from the TV/Internet. If I switch to basic home phone service and basic television (no DVR / GODFORBID) it will save me about $70 a month. Surely, it hasn't come to this! Can I live without high speed Internet? I'm not so sure today. My stomach is shaking at the thought of it. What do I keep? The phone is the bottom line, right? Everything else can go? I just don't know!!!!

Post Traumatic Mother's Day Stress Syndrome

2009-05-11T20:49:00.000-07:00

Pressure! Holidays always provide it. This Mother's Day was not without its usual disappointments and tears. My precious daughter, now a gorgeous 2o something single mom, informed me that I was just like my father...always putting people down and having a negative attitude. I just bug her still no matter what I say or do. My darling grand girls played kissing games with me and reminded me that, once again, I am the "NOT HOT" Grandma! My other workaholic daughter called to tell me she loved me, but she really had to get back to work now. The "cat's in the cradle" with that one, to be sure. I do love them all no matter what they say or do. They are life's most perfect gifts.

I did what any other negative, pessimistic NOT HOT Grandma would do: I came home and took a nap, soaked in a Jacuzzi, and drank a glass of wine. While in the community Jacuzzi, I met another mom whose Mother's Day was a lot worse than mine, and cost her a whole lot more. I ordered pizza from Domino's; she took her crew to The Grande Del Mar buffet. Her 20 something daughter was an hour late, brought her ex-boyfriend, and wore jeans. Her own mother mocked her drink ordering voice. AND SHE PAID! I dripped home counting my blessings!

This morning, my students told me today of what they did for Mother's Day with their moms. I was reminded of Megan's Mother's Day Parfait she made for me on many Mother's Days. Children love to be with their moms....but when does this cherished bond end? Sometime in the teen years, I suspect. Then Mom just bugs! My students are right in the middle of that transition. Some were all, "Sunday was Mother's Day so I had to stay home." Another got to serve her mom red wine for breakfast. (I want to live at her house!) And another took Mom to the La Jolla Beach and Tennis Club for a beach picnic. All kids love their moms, even if they bug.

Yes, I bug my kids, and there is a grain of truth to the comment that I am just like my father; however, I refuse to accept the NOT HOT Grandma title for one minute. Phew...the pressure is off for another year! The good news is I don't have to attend Father's Day any more....

The Great Disconnect

2009-05-09T08:39:00.000-07:00

It is me....Lori with my own website and blog spot, thanks to Jeff Boulton, my hero.

A friend pointed out to me last night how ironic it was that I wanted to blog about my "great disconnect" from technology June 1-September 1, 2009. I'm an English teacher. I LOVE IRONY! So I'm proceeding without abandon.

My plan is to turn off my cell phone, disconnect the cable and computer, move the tv to the garage, and write this summer. I want to see what I will do with the time I spent on Facebook, watching Oprah, and surfing websites. I live within walking distance of a library, movie theater, grocery store, and my work. There is even a yogurt shop and a yoga gym. I've been hatching this plot for months now. No one is confident I will actually do it.

All I know is that last summer was the best summer of my life. I want to top it this summer. And I don't want to look back and say....oh...with my summer off...I talked to people from high school on Facebook. I want to work out, walk the beach, explore my city, go to LA on the train, drive to national parks, read, write, and eat chocolate. So this is the "hatching" of my plot.

Is it possible to live with out technology for three months?